There are lots of things you can do on a Saturday in Lincoln Park that you can’t do on a Saturday in Lake Geneva. For instance, you can wait in line for an hour or two to get brunch. If that doesn’t sound like fun, well, then you’re obviously not in a Lincoln Park Saturday Frame Of Mind! You can also do all sorts of other amazing Lincoln Parky things, such as visit the zoo, or the park, or you could strap on your bullet proof vest and saunter down to the beach. What fun it could be! Aside from those scintillating things, I can’t exactly name another thing or two that you can do in Lincoln Park that you can’t do in Lake Geneva on a winter Saturday, but if we’re comparing the other way around the list might as well be endless, no Kevlar required.
While our list of Lake Geneva-ish things is impossibly long, there are a few key activities that should stand out. For instance, skiing. You could spend untold fortunes to buy up much of Lincoln Park, and once you’re completed you still couldn’t go skiing in your city back yard. I suppose you could construct a ramp out of wood and concrete and then ski down it for a moment, but that’s not quite like that video up there. That was sent to me by a prized client last weekend after a day of skiing with his kids in his lakefront back yard. Sure it’s not extreme skiing, but skiing on your own piece of lakefront property is satisfying, no matter what. Want to know where you can’t do that? Lincoln Park.
Lake Geneva 1, Lincoln Park 0.
I’m not a big gun guy. I’m not willing to slap a “This Home is Gun Free and Proud And Vulnerable” sticker on my front door, but it’s safe to say that guns aren’t my thing. If you’re in Lincoln Park on a Saturday, they had better not be your thing either. And why should they be? Aside from personal safety, there’s not much good that can come from a gun in the 60614. At Lake Geneva, we’re not huge into guns either, but if you have access to a piece of Agricultural or otherwise country land, you can enjoy such fine activities as the target shooting featured below. By “target shooting” I mean my two brothers shooting a 12 gauge into a scrap of wood behind my new house, but still. Target shooting is fun because it’s safe, it hurts your ears and your shoulder, and because it increases height, causes weight loss, and makes you live longer. That’s a fact.
Lake Geneva 2, Lincoln Park 0.
Now that our skis are stored and our ears sufficiently ringing, it’s time to venture onto the ice. I suppose people do venture onto the ice in Lincoln Park, but according to the news it appears as though it’s generally only dogs that dare tread on that thin ice. Here, during a winter such as this, we can head onto the ice with confidence, dog-less. All sorts of things happen on the ice here, including ice boating, ice skating, ice walking, ice slipping, ice fishing, ice driving, ice eating, and ice watching. If you don’t think it’s fun to explore a great big frozen lake, then after you’re done waiting two hours for your brunch, just take a drive up. Here’s a video from a few years ago proving my point.
Lake Geneva 3, Lincoln Park 0.
For fear of running up the score, I will stop now. It’s unfair of me to compare a Saturday in Lake Geneva to a Saturday in Lincoln Park, and that’s even before I start tapping my Maple trees for the great syrup experiment of 2013, which will unfold before your eyes right here in the next week or so. For now, just come to the lake this weekend. It’ll be fun. You can go out and look at houses with me, and that’s most definitely something you can’t do in the city this weekend. Lincoln Park is made for weekdays, Lake Geneva, for the weekends.